It’s Your Will, Not Mine

For a whole year, my youth group and I spent a lot of time and energy participating in fundraising activities to fund our mission trip to Haiti. As a group, we were excited and anticipating going to Haiti to share the gospel and show God’s love.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Unfortunately, two weeks before we were to fly out to Haiti, I broke two of my toes. I figured I could still go to Haiti, but it would just be a little harder for me to do different activities and some I might have to sit out. However, when I went to the doctor, she gave me some news that I was not anticipating: She told me I needed to have surgery, because since I could not move my toes, I might have a ruptured tendon…. and that I would risk getting an infection if I go to Haiti with an open wound.

I was totally devastated.

I started to question God about why He let this happen to me, especially when I was going to Haiti to share the Gospel and God’s love. I couldn’t understand, but then I remembered the verse Jeremiah 29:11-12 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.”

I felt like God was telling me that not everything in life works out as we plan; however, He knows what He is doing and that He has a plan for everything that happens in our life. We just have to trust Him.

I started to pray that He would direct me where He wants me and that He would give me peace about what He wanted for me. I realized that God might be telling me something or directing me some place else. He might have something bigger for me. I continued to pray that whatever His will is, He would give me peace about it. I knew that if I was not able to go, I had to accept that. Yet I kept on praying that God would heal my toe well enough so that I would not have to have surgery (if that was His will).

I finally had peace about not being able to go to Haiti. I let it go and gave it to God for Him to handle. It finally came time for my surgery…my parents asked for some x-rays before my surgery. The doctor looked at my x-rays and saw I could move my toes and decided I did not need to have surgery after all! It was an answered prayer!

God wanted me to lean on Him in the trials and tough times, to let go and let Him handle it, and to have peace about changing directions. In return, He healed my toe well enough and allowed me to go!

God used this trial to teach me that I can trust Him and pray to Him wherever I am and whenever I want. When I was in Haiti, He was my strength to keep going when the steep and rough terrain was difficult to endure with crutches and a walking boot. Whenever it became difficult for me, I would pray and remember Philippians 4:13 “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” God would suddenly give me a boost of energy to keep going.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There were some activities I couldn’t participate in because of my broken toes, but during those times, God put on my heart to pray for the Haitian people and kids we met. Many other times I prayed for people as we passed by.

Although, I went to Haiti excited to share the Gospel and show God’s love, God also used my time in Haiti and the people I met to draw me closer to Him in prayer and trust.